Timothy was away last week on the 8th grade trip to Washington DC. He left early in the morning on the 15th and got home around 10pm on the 18th. I was apprehensive about letting him go on a trip far away with a pretty high teenager to chaperone ratio! However, we have so much commotion in our house that once he left, I barely noticed he was gone.
Saturday morning the other kids were all very excited to see Timothy. Jesse hung on him all day, following him around, imitating him, playing video games, and being very jealous of the switch-blade comb that Timothy had bought for himself while away. Adorable.
But even cuter than that was Morgan's reaction. He was so excited to see Timothy that he literally jumped up and down and across the room to hug him, repeatedly. Big bear hugs and big smiles, for hours.
I have read that autism can be tough on a marriage and on siblings and generally on a family. Certainly this is true, but it focuses on the negative and not on the balance. With great challenge comes great reward, that's just how life works.
Yes, I have an 11-year that outweighs me and we had to put a new doorknob on the laundry room that requires a key to get out instead of in just so we can keep all the food safe from Morgan's early morning binges. He cried and fought getting shots at the doctor and even Josh struggled to counteract Morgan's extreme strength. I wipe peanut butter off the iPad every day. Outings as a family are carefully planned to be Morgan-friendly or else are only with one parent.
The daughter of one of Morgan's paras from last year came over on Tuesday afternoon to interview Timothy for a piece she's writing for NPR on the impact of autism on siblings. Among other things, she asked him if other kids at school teased him because of Morgan. "Sometimes," he said, "but I don't really care what they think. I know he's a good kid." Then all the kids showed her how they can bowl together on the Xbox Kinect.
I have an 11-year old that loves his siblings and jumps across the room with excitement to hug them. I have 3 other kids that love him back. They play games he can play, read books with him, and snuggle with him on the couch. He invites them to jump on the bed, they invite him to play iPad with collectively sticky fingers.
I cannot be thankful for autism, no one can. It would be like being thankful for cancer. But I can be thankful for how my family has reacted to it, how it has brought us together as a unit, and how my children have learned certain lessons early - lessons that others may not learn in their lifetime.
Who cares what anyone else thinks, I know we're awesome.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Rhonda
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