July 1, 2011

There are 2 actuarial interns in my department this summer. They are eager and young and just so very refreshing. They haven't been beaten down by years of corporate life. And better yet, they hang on my every word and laugh at all my jokes.

I received an email from one of them on Tuesday afternoon. I later found out that someone had told him that if he emailed me, it should not be more than 3 sentences because I don't like for people to drone on and on. And so I received an email of 3 sentences that essentially said he knew I was very busy but would I be willing to have lunch with him and the other intern some time. I think he used the word busy 7 times in 3 sentences.

I replied "How about breakfast on Thursday" and assured him I was not THAT busy.

So Thursday morning I had breakfast with the 2 interns. Let's call them John and Mary. John wore a tie. We got our breakfast and sat down and I said, "So, what do we want to talk about?" Mary froze and kicked John under the table. John cleared his throat. "Well, I want to be a senior executive in a large insurance company like Aetna. So my question is, how do I do that?"

This is the first time I've gotten this question. I've had many meals with many interns and new students over time. I usually get the "what's the difference between consulting and insurance" question, since not too many people have done both. Or in a group of all females I'll almost surely get the various work-life balance questions. But this was a great and fun question!

I won't bore you with my answer. Between that and the follow-ups, we were quite chatty for the next hour. Mary warmed up pretty quickly and eventually ended up giving me a really big compliment while sounding completely sincere. She said, "Whenever you talk, I understand everything you say." Ok, that doesn't sound like much, but when you're an actuary, let's just say that makes you pretty special.

So two scared interns made it through breakfast with the big bad boss and seemingly enjoyed themselves.

In other Rhonda-is-scary news, apparently I'm scary. I was not happy about something today and trying to decide whom to tell of my discontent - level A or level A's bosses. I IM'd a coworker from another department to see what she thought. "Just level A is fine, they work really hard to stay off your radar, so if you tell them, they'll take care of it." I should note none of these people report to me, nor do I have authority over them in any way. They are all older with more experience than me, and odds are they make more money. I guess they scare kinda easy.

Actually that's a pattern with who is afraid of me - they are never the people who work FOR me. In fact, new people to the department always say the same thing. About a month in when we meet at the water cooler and I ask how it's going, they say, "I'd heard so much about you, I thought you'd be scarier. But you're really nice!" Thanks?

It's not news. I've been terrifying since I was a teenager and I've never known why, but that surely doesn't stop me from using it to my advantage. After all, the best leaders lead by example. But when that's not an option, brute intimidation works pretty well too.*

Hope everyone has a great long weekend!
Rhonda

*despair.com - arrogance